Reading a place setting without hesitation
Three forks, two knives, a spoon above the plate and a row of glasses: a formally laid table is intimidating, but it follows a wonderfully simple logic.
You sit down, unfold your napkin, and find a small army of silverware in front of you. Three forks on the left, two knives and a spoon on the right, a spoon and a fork laid crosswise above the plate, and four glasses lined up like soldiers. The first reflex is to glance discreetly at what your neighbours are doing. There is no need: a laid table reads like a sentence, from left to right and from the outside in.
The golden rule
Always start with the cutlery furthest from the plate, and move closer to the centre with each new course. The starter is eaten with the outer fork and knife, the fish with the next ones, the main course with those almost touching the plate. Butlers lay the table in the order of the menu: you only have to trust them.
In Titanic, Molly Brown slips Jack this advice before his first dinner in first class: start from the outside and work your way in. Seven years earlier, in Pretty Woman, the hotel manager gave Vivian exactly the same lesson. Two films, two heroines, one rule.
Left and right
Forks go on the left, knives and the soup spoon on the right. The knife blade always faces the plate, in every country. Dessert cutlery sits above the plate: the fork with its handle to the left and the spoon with its handle to the right, so that each hand finds them naturally when the time comes.
Glasses are lined up above the knives, from largest to smallest starting on the left: the water glass, then the red wine glass, then the white wine glass. The champagne flute, when there is one, sits slightly behind. A tip for round tables, where you are never quite sure which bread is yours: you eat on the left and drink on the right. Your bread is on the left, your glasses on the right. That is all.
French peculiarities
The French table has a few particularities that surprise foreigners, and that are pleasant to know.
- Forks are laid with their tines facing down onto the tablecloth. The habit is said to date from the days when families had their coats of arms engraved on the back of their silver, which they wished to display.
- The soup spoon is turned over as well.
- At a traditional dinner, there is no side plate: bread is placed directly on the tablecloth, to the left of the plate.
- Bread is never cut with a knife. It is broken with the fingers, one mouthful at a time.
During and after the meal
Your cutlery speaks for you. Crossed or in a V on the plate, tips towards the centre, it means you have not finished. Placed side by side, parallel and at an angle on the plate, it signals that the plate may be cleared. Never put used cutlery on the tablecloth, and never push your plate away: wait for it to be taken.
The napkin goes on your lap as soon as you sit down, folded in half. Dab your lips, never wipe, and do so before drinking so as not to leave a mark on the glass. If you must leave the table for a moment, place it on your chair. At the end of the meal, leave it on the table to the left of your plate, unfolded: folding it neatly would suggest you hope to be invited back the next day.
The butler and his ruler
In Downton Abbey, the butler Carson measures with a ruler the spacing of the cutlery and the distance between each plate and the edge of the table. The scene raises a smile, but it reflects the reality of the great houses, where tables were laid with a watchmaker’s precision. You will never need a ruler. Simply remember the spirit of the scene.
A beautiful table is not a crowded table; it is a table where everything is in its place.
And if, despite everything, you pick up the wrong fork? Carry on with it. The maître d’ will bring another, and nobody will remember. The only real fault would be to draw attention to it.
